A gracious grande dame much loved and admired

Padmakanthi Parathalingam

It was twelve moons ago, in early spring when flowers stirred to bloom and sparrows darted in earnest, the Angels came. Seated in her plumed gardens, a daily ritual in later life, sipping tea and having her favourite muffins with her children and grandchildren in tranquil attendance, she suddenly fell ill, retired to bed, and in a few hours, she was gone. She was 91.

A favoured farewell for one of the most gracious and gentle ladies of her time. She believed in God and miracles. Perhaps He obliged in a rare gesture of goodwill.

To the manor born with Sri Lankan Tamil aristocratic connections from the early 19th century, she lived her early teenage life of grandeur and sophistication with due modesty. She had two brothers and two sisters, all living next door to each other at Wijerama Mawatha Colombo 7, an address that could go into the history books for its gracious residents of old.

Educated at St Bridget’s Convent, a nursery for many Buddhist and Hindu aristocracy in its early days, she was considered a sultry beauty with penchant for music and literature, also Mills and Boon. Just out of her teens, she met and married the dashing ex-Royal cricket captain and head prefect, the great Para, in what could be only described as a fairy tale romance. He himself hailed from a precocious cricketing family and was the son of the distinguished QC, C. Thiagalingam.

It was a marriage of two glamorous people and two notable families. It was a case of many heartaches and broken dreams for their friends on both sides. They lavished the social circles of the day with their charm and elegance. Sadly, it did not last long. Para died at 45, leaving a widow with seven kids ranging in age from 5 to 20.  A Shakespearean tragedy. She turned despair into determination, plunging into the responsibilities of a devoted mother.

How well she executed the role is the legacy she has left behind.

As for me, I have admired no one more than her, with the exception of my father, and perhaps my own sister. She came close to proving to me that love can exist without a selfish motive. She loved her children with astonishing empathy. For her they could do no wrong. She was ruthlessly gentle. I never heard her raise her voice or admonish anyone. She epitomised the concept of ‘walking away’ in social conflict. Everyone who knew her loved her. Whenever someone knew me as her son-in-law, I would get a glossary of compliments and a litany of confessions of how lucky I was being her in-law. At times it was embarrassing.

I will never forget the two years she looked after my children in Sri Lanka, when I sent them back from the UK, to learn our background and culture. They were nine and eleven. They loved their Aachaa so much they refused to come back to England and wished to stay with her. They both eventually graduated as medical doctors in the UK. To them still Aachaa is numero uno. So, it is for all her grandchildren. Her capacity for love for them  knew no bounds.

She wrote to my wife every week when we left to the UK. The postman having got used to delivering these letters with inimitable handwriting would comment – Sir, your weekly journal has arrived.

She wrote at least twenty pages each time. They were ridiculously simple and mercilessly fluent. They were more commentaries of daily events than correspondence, charmingly elegant and malignantly absorbing. Sadly, I learned nothing from her great style. She was a consummate conversationalist and well at ease on any topic, whether it be cricket, literature, religion or “Mills and Boon”. She enjoyed tittle-tattle and harmless gossip, and her laughter would illuminate any conversation.

She will be missed by her doting children and grandchildren many of whom are eminent lawyers and doctors. I will miss her enormous versatility.

As the Bard would say “Age cannot not wither her, nor custom stale her infinite variety.”

May she rest in resplendent peace.

Victor Wimalasingham

 A man of integrity, his service to Kandy will not be forgotten

A.B. Damunupola

A.B. Damunupola’s life and career left an indelible mark on
Sri Lanka’s public service. Hailing from Kandy, he inherited a legacy of integrity and leadership and his contributions to the nation are a testament to his unwavering dedication to the people and the country’s administrative systems.

Beginning his education at St. Anthony’s College, Katugastota, he went on to graduate from the University of Peradeniya. His exceptional academic achievements earned him the highest marks in the Ceylon Civil Service examination, securing a scholarship to pursue further studies at the University of Cambridge in the United Kingdom.

Mr. Damunupola had a distinguished career in the Ceylon Civil Service. Notably, he served as the Special Commissioner of the Kandy Municipality Council (a position now recognised as Mayor), the Government Agent of Kandy, and the Post Master General of Sri Lanka. Additionally, he served as Secretary to the Minister of Mahaweli, showcasing his versatile leadership across multiple sectors.

Regardless of the government in power, Mr. Damunupola’s services were consistently recognised for their excellence and commitment to the public. During the 1983 July communal riots, he took swift and decisive action to restore law and order, ensuring that essential services continued without disruption.

In 1982, during Queen Elizabeth II’s visit to Kandy, Mr. Damunupola received high praise for the warm hospitality and outstanding reception extended to the royal delegation. As a token of appreciation, Queen Elizabeth sent a letter and signed photograph to Mr. Damunupola, acknowledging his exemplary service.

He played a central role in the construction of the Kandyan Art Auditorium and the Mahaiyawa crematorium.

While serving as the Government Agent in Kandy, when he became aware that a liquor permit had been granted unjustly by a government minister, he took the principled step of cancelling it. Though the minister soon exerted considerable pressure on him, demanding that the permit be reinstated within 24 hours, Mr. Damunupola steadfastly refused, choosing to act in the best interest of the public and his administrative duties. As a result, he was transferred from his position.

His actions earned him the respect and admiration of the public, who saw him as a symbol of honesty, fairness, and courage in public service.

With his untimely passing at the age of 51, the country lost an exemplary public servant. A prominent area in Kandy has been named after him as A.B. Damunupola Mawatha.

He was born into a distinguished family of government servants. His brother, T.B. Damunupola, was the Principal of Ananda College, Colombo, while another brother, G.B. Damunupola, served as the former Commissioner of Buddhist Affairs. He was married to renowned UN diplomat Jayantha Dhanapala’s sister, Shiranee Dhanapala and they made a powerful partnership in both their personal and professional lives. They had two children. Their daughter Manouri Damunupola, is married to a former Basnayake Nilame Seevali Nugegoda, while their son, Arjuna Damunupola has followed in his father’s footsteps, contributing to society.

Dinuthri Nugegoda

A mentor, colleague and friend

Dr. S. V. Thamber

I write in appreciation of my mentor, colleague and friend in the ophthalmic field, Dr. S.V. Thamber who was a consultant at the National Eye Hospital, Colombo. He passed away on January 27 after a brief illness. He was a great and honourable gentleman in every sense of these words.

He had his training at the Eye Hospital and Moorfields Eye Hospital, London. He was appointed a consultant at the National Eye Hospital in 1962. After retirement in 1982 he migrated to Australia where he practised for a short period. During his tenure at the National Eye Hospital, he was the most sought-after surgeon and patients came to him from all parts of the country.

He was a teacher par excellence. It is not often that we come across teachers of his calibre when considered by such standards as knowledge, teaching ability and humility. He always had the patients’ care and wellbeing foremost in his mind and never failed to seek advice from another consultant if he had any doubt about a diagnosis or treatment.

He was looked upon by his colleagues and subordinate staff with admiration and respect. He was overly generous and willing to help anyone in need.

After retirement we kept in touch and discussed matters of mutual interest. A few days before his demise, he spoke to me and wished me a happy new year.

My condolences to his wife and members of his family.

May he rest in peace.

Dr. Upali Mendis